Boundaries - How And Why You Need Them!

Hey beautiful souls,

have you ever felt like someone crossed the line, stepped on, maybe even disrespected you?

Well, I don't know about you but I have had those experiences before.

They're not fun, and quite frankly they're annoying. lol like for real, who likes to be in a hostile environment? NOT ME!

This is why I'm making this post. Because once I started setting boundaries for myself, I feel more in control of my emotions.

Now I know, I get to decide who I want to surround myself with, spend my time with or conversate with. Because if something is not serving me in a good way then I absolutely refuse to spend my energy on that.

Let me tell you something,

I'm Marthina Llamas, a recovering people pleaser, I still relapse once in a while but I recognize that I have every right to go first in my life, and there is no reason why I need to apologize for the person I am, the values I hold, or the goals and dreams I have. I am allowed and worthy to keep relationships I want to keep and leave and release once that I want to release.

I want to give you some Principles that I believe to be important and necessary when you are starting off setting boundaries for yourself.

One: Know Your Worth!

You are here living this human experience but you are Divine, past physical realm!

You shift energy, and you are this vibration that attracts and craves so much love! 

This makes your experience here on Earth Thrilling, and Exciting!

Everything positive, beautiful, enlightened, flows to you abundantly just by following your dreams. This is Magical! 

Do everything in your power to stay true to yourself no matter how frightening that sounds. (More on this later)

(it will get hard, having to let go of people you thought and tried convincing yourself to keep. You will have to stand up for yourself, even if the "consequences" look awful, remember, its nothing but an experience but if you can choose what makes you happy and release what doesn't, then your only outcome is more happiness.)

BTW practicing gratitude here is amazing.

Being thankful for everything that you are, everything you have and so thankful for the experiences you've had that have only confirmed what you want more of or have opened your eyes on what no longer serves you.

Also, fall in love with yourself.

There is no one else on this planet like you, no one who sees things the way you do, no one who has had your specific experiences.

You are beautiful and divine love.

Two: Be Clear On Your Morals and What Is Important To You

If you cant tell someone what you don't want, how can you say what you do want?

Get crystal clear in your goals, who you have to be in order to make that happen, what characteristics you have to keep/leave or even adopt as your own to embody that version of you who already has these dreams desires?

Most importantly, why are these things important to you?

Your Why is so important because its the thing that will keep you going in moments when fear creeps up (because it does, and it will).

Your Why is the reason WHY you want what you want.

What you will benefit by having these dream desires into reality. 

And what others will benefit from your dream desires coming into reality.

Without a solid Why, you will feel lost.

Again, speaking from personal experience,

There was a time where I thought I was doing something for me or something I thought I really wanted to do and achieve but couldn't quite commit to doing what I had to do to get there.

That's because I was doing all that for the wrong reasons.

My why didn't quite support that or better yet,

what I thought was my goal, didn't support my Why. Make sense?

For example, Why I do what I do and desire to have what I dream to bring into my reality are for a couple reasons, but mainly :

To provide the best for my family.

Financial abundance to do What I want, When I want, Wherever I want.

To live my life joyfully fulfilled doing what I love, and being unapologetically, authentically me.

To Inspire others and be living proof of success by following my dreams.

To be a voice, a guided light, support for others.

This or better!

(I recommend you journal this sh** out) Moving on...

Three: Decide

Using the journal prompts above and getting clear on what you want and don't want, you have to make a choice.

Option 1 - Go for it. LEAP!

Option 2 - Hold back with fear.

Ok, Listen up,

Fear is ALWAYS going to be there, you just have to decide to do it anyway.

Recognize the fear, listen to what kind of thoughts you might be telling yourself in your head that is causing you to feel fearful of this unknown, and decide to do what you have to do despite all of that because you Know (and you will know, if it feels right or not) that the growth you are seeking, the desires and dreams are on the other side of fear.

Simple as that (simple right.. haha),

What got you Here won't get you There.

You have to be willing to try something different, get outside of your comfort zone because comfort is just a zone that your mind has made up that is telling you "this right here is safe" ... "that over there is unknown so we don't go over there because we have to protect ourselves and that can be dangerous because its unknown territory."

Whats it gonna be?

I have a story,

When I was in the Army there were times I would be gone from my family, my hometown in months even over a year on end.

But when I finally was able to go home to visit for a week or two, I would go home and see that nothing ever really changed.

Not only at home, but with hometown friends or acquaintances.

Everyone was still doing the same thing, listening to the same thing, wanting the same thing...just straight boring and "safe".

When I look back at those memories I think to myself I want to be different,

I don't want to live an ordinary life.

One of my biggest fears now is to be the same person year after year, month after month. How scary is that?!

I thrive for change and evolution!

Yes, I still get uneasy and overwhelmed at the moment but I have now decided to look at the unknown as an adventure, and fear as my compass to what I might have to dive into rather than move back from.

Growth, inward and outward is what excites me.

Think of this like moving houses, when we moved away from my childhood house I was so sad!

I can still see this house in my mind when I close my eyes as one of the happiest places.

But with that move came, change.

Same thing mentally and emotionally,

We have to be willing to move from this safe, comfortable state, to an unknown, maybe fearful at the moment, but adventurous, exciting state.

There you have it my loves.

I hope this inspires you to set some boundaries for yourself so that you can be unfuckwithable!

And also get clear on your dream desires.

Be fearless in the pursuit of your dreams<3

Wishing you all the abundance, love and joy!

Love you lots!!

Dream Catchers

With Love Always,

Tina oxo